Dec 27, 2016


    It's pretty weird isn't it, to be writing only a few posts a year. Heck, this might be my one and only post for 2016. I miss this. I really do miss this. Typing, letting my hands go freely on the keyboard, trying to piece my thoughts as I go. Realizing that, certain thoughts would only show themselves at the presence of an alternative to materialize them into concrete words.

     To have 2016 in summary, well, I had my convocation this year. I took IELTS, applied for scholarships (trying to fund myself to do my postgrad abroad) to no avail lol. But I am glad that I tried it all, despite the circumstances and doubts hehe. I always believe that opportunities, will be available for those who seek them. I also ventured into Early Childhood Education, something I have always wanted to do and was deeply torn when I had to choose between it and school. But I made my choice, and with God's grace, I hope it's the right choice.

     Emotionally speaking, 2016 was not exactly an easy year for me. A lot of friends that I have spoken to also admit the same thing. That when you graduated, you are suddenly pulled into the vortex of adulthood. Though you already have been anticipating it, it does not decrease the shock of reality when it hit you. You suddenly lost your constant social circle, and can no longer indulge yourself in the luxury of flexible timing. But then again, this is a phase of life we need to be prepared for. When you are stripped of your comfort zone, it's a little bit scary because you are left with you and your thoughts. Your happy thoughts, melancholic thoughts, ambitious thoughts, and all sorts of thoughts. It's a little bit scary, that since you have less distractions, you have no choice but to face all these thoughts. In a way, it is a good thing, because you will know yourself better by making friends with your fears. I guess.

     I'll take whatever that is good from 2016. I am thankful that I have graduated with what I have always wanted, that pink sash and an award I have never seen coming, The Best Graduate Award. I know it means so little to some people, but still, I am happy that I get to present this to my parents heheh. The next on I am aiming on the list is a bit trickier, for this one has no textbooks to rely upon, being a teacher in school. For a very long time, I have realized that teaching does not come easy for me. I struggled when I did my practicum, constantly asking myself, is this enough? Am I doing my best for my students? So for 2017, I hope that I am granted the patience and will to keep on learning, no matter how disappointing things can get. Yeah, I've been hearing pretty scary parts of teaching but I am determined to contribute in any way I can. InsyaAllah.

     I am also, very thankful for the few good friends I have in 2016. We don't know how long good companionship can last, but I am thankful to have a friend who is always there for me. Thank you :)

     Predicting the natural course of human behaviour, I foresee that some people would be leaving my life in 2017. It's only natural that people leave right, especially when you hit a bump and you no longer can agree on anything to keep it together. I am not being vindictive about it or anything, for I have accepted that this is merely the nature of life. Sheesh, why does this post sounds so pessimist hahaha. But hey, I've got exciting travelling plans to look forward to with my good friends, so that's something hehe.

Anyhow, Alhamdulillah 'ala kulli hal. May Allah ease it all for 2017 :)