Hai hey haiyo heiyo people! These few days I have been running out of words to type, running out of ideas to talk about, losing my mood to blog. Haishhhh. Now that I got so much time in my hand, I don't know what should I do. Definitely there's a lot of things to do but things don't simply work without mood. I'm trying to finish reading a book but I have lost my interest. And after my sister finished watching the movie which is based on the book, she came up to me and said "Boring gilerrrr citer tuuhh". And that makes me more unmotivated to finish reading it. Awesome =.="
I don't know what went wrong. I tried to start on other books but I just can't get the mood. I seem to have lost that passion. Hurm. You know how some people who when they start on a book and they can't stop reading it? They had to finish reading no matter what before they can really do other things? And how they forget to have their meals for being so preoccupied with the book? And how you get lost in the book until you are completely oblivious of what's going on around you? How you are sooo in mood till you are able to remember some lines from the books because you think that they are so meaningful and they are attached to your heart? I used to have that kinda mood but now, it's gone and I don't know why.
I used to love books. Well not to the extent of "OMGEE-there's that book and I want it and I want that too and and that, and those, and these and every single book even the colouring books!" when you go to a book store while pointing to everywhere with silly excited face. Okay fine, maybe sometimes, but it's just that, it's something that I prefer to do during my free time or when I have to get distracted for awhile. Reading books somehow takes me to another world and let me forget about mine for awhile, and it actually did make me feel better during my hard days. Man, I didn't believe I typed that. Haha but yeah it's kinda true. But that was then. Now? I have lost it. Bummer.
That gets me thinking, sometimes in our lives, we get caught up with so many things, we may not even realize what's going on around our system. How certain things that happened change our perspectives of life. How certain pain modifies our defensive system against hazardous threats and simply how we react everyday. As time pass by, we have changed. For better or worse? Depends. I personally think that when a person have changed, I mean when he/she manages to build a new positive side of him/her, then he/she will also develop one negative side. By my observation to myself and some other people who are close to me, I found that that's kinda one of the way human psychology works. That is why, we could never be perfect. We could only try but never will be because of that theory.
Well let's take it this way. Reading books gets me off my problems but when that doesn't happen, is it fair to say that maybe I don't want to be taken away from my problem. I want to live in it. Ughh, that sounds pathetic. Maybe I want all those problems solved rather than being taken away and all the petty things that keep on bugging even a small part of my subconscious mind to be solved, rather than escaping from it. Then before you realize it you would be doing all sorta freaky things which in the end just make the mess messier. Oh, what am I talking about? Gotta get a grip.
But of course, that's merely an opinion which is not verified by scientific procedures for the validity to be proven of :P Ahh, well, try to observe the people around you and you will see it for yourself. Oh I'm done babbling. Well at least I have updated my blog. Haha. I hope my 'reading mood' will come back. I seriously do. Okay then, have a nice day people ;)
-Now that I have lost one part of me, which other part of me that has emerged? :/